City of Girls

I've just finished reading, actually listening to, the book City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert. I love the way she tells stories. Interesting how the timing of me selecting and finishing this book relates to other musings of late. The topic? Relationships, and the different kinds of relationships we have. At the end of the book, the author in her unique way reminds us that different kinds of relationships are necessary. As we grow into more of our authentic self, the need we have for authentic relationships also grows. I believe one of our challenges as a society is acknowledging the different kinds of relationships people require and finding the language to communicate within these diverse relationships.

I like how the main character in Elizabeth Gilbert's book conveys the unique dynamics of the relationships she experiences. The character is telling her life story, her perspective, when she is significantly older. In reflections of my own relationships in my younger years compared to the present I definitely see the changes of the needs I have. I also realize more concretely what my needs were when I was younger, why I made the decisions that I did. This reflection helps me in my current season of life. I remember an elementary teacher once telling me, "Kelly, remember that there is always an end in a friend." I was obviously misspelling "friend-freind" but I remember thinking, I don't like that idea. However, now I understand that some friendships are intended to be for a short period of time and others are intended to be for a lifetime. The challenge of course is knowing what kind of relationship each one is meant to be, having the courage to live one's values in that relationship, and through the experience hopefully gain the intended wisdom the Universe desires.

A moment in my adult years occurred in which I asked myself, "Is this relationship a mistake?" I now believe I was asking the wrong question. Numerous alternative questions in regards to relationships are available. This is why I believe in the value of life coaching. Well trained and gifted life coaches have the ability to ask different questions while pushing a person to live their core values. But, as I write this blog, I realize I'm getting away from my original reason for sharing my thoughts.

I really like the book City of Girls.

I'm not a professional book reviewer; I'm simply acting as a consumer of popular general adult fiction. And so, the book pushed me to see another perspective of the different kinds of relationships we may experience. Also, while one kind of relationship works for one person, that same kind of relationship may not work for another. Here's the secret, I think, when considering the different relationships around us: remove judgment. I love reading realistic fiction because a well written story allows me to explore how various relationships evolve and challenges me to ask different questions about the relationships in my own life.